To Stay In or to Go Out
The cost-benefit analysis of weekend plans
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To stay in or to go out, that is the question. It’s the dance we do while checking the time before we’re supposed to meet up with friends after a long day at work. Finding the answer is often a matter of conducting a cost-benefit analysis: How far is the restaurant? How well do I know these people? And, most important: Will I regret not going?
FOMO, “fear of missing out,” can serve as a powerful engine for social engagements. Hearing the stories from that one night you stayed in can incentivize you to take a chance on the next invite. But not all plans are meant to be kept, and sometimes, the couch looks more appealing. The dance never ends—it’s just a matter of figuring out what’s worth making time for.
On Being Social
Your FOMO Is Trying to Tell You Something
By Faith Hill
Maybe you are missing out.
The Easiest Way to Keep Your Friends
By Serena Dai
It’s a little boring, a little type A, and a lot better than letting relationships fizzle.
How to Flake Gracefully
By Olga Khazan
An introvert’s guide to canceling plans without losing your friends
Still Curious?
- What adults forget about friendship: Just catching up can feel stale. Playing and wasting time together like kids do is how you make memories, Rhaina Cohen wrote in 2023.
- The scheduling woes of adult friendship: To avoid the dreaded back-and-forth of coordinating hangouts, some friends are repurposing the shared digital calendar, a workplace staple, to plan their personal lives, Tori Latham wrote in 2019.
Other Diversions
- The benefit of doing things you’re bad at
- The Stranger Things effect comes for the novel.
- “Dear James”: Oh, how the men drone on.
P.S.
I recently asked readers to share a photo of something that sparks their sense of awe in the world. “I didn’t know the red-tailed hawk was in the picture til I looked at it later!” Sharon Gunderson wrote about her ski trip to Flagstaff, Arizona. “And the light through the ice-lined aspen branches just made my heart sing all day.”
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— Stephanie
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